Dropping out of the challenge.

I have some good news!  My boss at the restaurant I just started working at asked me to become a manager there.  It would mean more money, a reliable paycheck and a lot more control over my own job and life.   It would, however, mean a lot more time at work, and they want me to start next week.  Seeing as I have about half the challenge (recording, performing, 8 classes, 1 lesson, 8 meals, 5 charity events, another audition) to do in the next ten days, not to mention working, attending a friend's wedding, helping with "Afterschool" (it counts for ONE of my charities even though I do it every week....grrr) and working my usual shifts at the restaurant, I'm not sure there are enough hours in the day to do all that AND sleep enough to be awake for all of it.  I put all my commitments into a google calendar and there is no way it can all happen with this job.  Hmmmmm, I think i need Hermione's time-turner right about now.  

  

So what will I do?  This job is a longer-term commitment than the challenge is, and it has to come first, so I can support myself.  I won't accomplish ANY of the artistic things I want to do if I am chewed up and spit out by the cost of living in NYC, and end up back at my parent's place.  This challenge has held me accountable to my practicing and taking class, and kicked my butt to do the things (like auditioning) I want to do but are uncomfortable, which is exactly what I wanted it for!  Finishing it and winning a great prize for my effort would be great too, though.  I want that recognition.  

So what will I do?  Do I make myself crazy and try to accomplish an impossible amount of things in a week, with the risk that I will not finish the challenge or that I will get my new job off to a bad start?  Or do I admit that this challenge has been amazing but it needs to take second priority to my new job and my long-term life?  Ugh, that sounds so responsible and boring.  

So that's what needs to happen.  I really hate quitting things!!!!!!  Even if it's the logical and better thing to do, i still feel inadequate.  Like somehow I am supposed to figure out a way to get around the the facts (24 hours in a day, sleep is necessary, the subway takes a certain time, etc) and accomplish more, more, more!  Maybe if mom and dad were still paying the bills I could focus fully on my education and performing, but that funding dried up a long time ago.  

This challenge has been such a great learning experience for me.  I have never before practiced singing EVERY day like that, and it has helped me so much!  It forced me to get back into dance class, which I had stopped for a while, and I am SO thankful for that!  I regret that I didn't record a demo or perform live yet (the challenge also reminded me how organized I need to be) and I doubt that I will get to do those things in the next week.  They were two things that are scary to me, but I know I will feel so much better once I "jump into the cold water" and just do them (in the next few weeks, i guess?).  

Kurt, thanks so much for organizing this.  I hope that lots of people manage to finish all their tasks and win all the great prizes!!

How am I doing?

Daily Practice - check.
4 Voice lessons - 2 down, 2 scheduled.  on track
2 Coaching sessions - 1 down, 1 tentatively tomorrow.  on track.
Perform live. - Next tuesday at webster hall
20 Dance classes.  12 down, 8 to go.
Record a demo. - not organized.  Kurt's suggestions yesterday were great, not sure when I can get this done.
Charity - 0 done.  2 events scheduled, 1 is getting organized.  1 was canceled :(, so I have to figure out to do 2 more.
Audition - I went to one and got typed out.  I'm planning on going to the Gateway Playhouse auditions on monday morning.
25 Healthy meals - 17 done, 8 left to go.

Daily Practice #18

Today I practiced in the evening.  My voice - like my body - is tired and tense tonight.....  but I guess that's what professionalism is:  doing it even when you don't feel like it, and working to make your bad days look (sound) like a good day!

Day 17

Today was a big day!

I went to Ripley Grier in the morning, and rented a room for $5 to warm up and practice!    Then I attended the audition for Chicago in Media, PA.  That's me (with no eyes) in the holding room.  A very sweet guy who was trying out for Mary Sunshine took the picture :)

I ate two healthy meals today (#15 & 16)  and took ballet with Natalia Stavro.  Rachel and CJ were also there. The picture of that class is on Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10100890355826664&set=a.10100347693885544.3024948.8333527&type=1&theater

Then I went to work alllllllll night!

Daily Practice #16

I can't believe I have been doing this every day.  It is actually getting easier, and my voice falls into place a lot quicker each morning since I have been doing it.  I also feel like I have more control of my placement, and I can choose what kind of quality I want to use for each song.  Yay!

Meal #14

More healthy ingredients!

Dance Class #8&9

Two classes yesterday with very sweaty teachers :) Diane Laurenson and Matthew Powell!